3,000 couldn't be sweeter for Jeter

When it comes to seizing a moment, it’s hard to beat Derek Jeter.

Criticism was swirling, calls mounting for him to be moved to 8th in the order in the midst of the chase for a historic milestone. But Saturday, Jeter did what he does best, captivate once again.

It wasn’t so much about the game, a July afternoon contest between AL East foes pretty commonplace. This was Derek Jeter’s day.

Booming chants of ‘Deh-rick Jeter,’ a Yankee Stadium crowd as frenzied as one come mid-October.  A 3-2 count, facing off with All-Star David Price, one of the game’s best young pitchers. Wouldn’t you know that Jeter, the guy who ‘doesn’t hit homeruns,’ clubs one into left field for hit #3,000. You could not do it in more dramatic fashion. Jeter makes Yankee Stadium or whatever field he’s on his own personal Broadway when all eyes are on him. And it wasn’t just a one-act play Saturday.

Jeter proceeded to finish 5 for 5, a triple away from the cycle. That’s the first five-hit game for any player at the new Yankee Stadium. Oh yeah, he also drove in the game winning run with his fifth and final hit of the day. A pretty good day out at the ballpark for the Yankee captain.

But if you’ve watched Jeter and the Yankees all these years, you shouldn’t be surprised. A flair for the dramatic is par for the course for #2. Oakland fans still have to shudder at the sight of Jeter, remembering him coming out of nowhere to flip the ball to Jorge Posada and get Jeremy Giambi out at home plate, keep the Yankees up 1-0, backs against the wall down 2-0 in the 2001 ALDS.

Though he hadn’t hit a homerun in the Bronx in nearly a year (an inside-the-park one against the Royals), some of Jeter’s most memorable moments are homers. The 10th inning shot off Byung-Yun Kim in the 2001 World Series that earned him the Mr. November moniker. His leadoff homer in game three of the Subway Series World Series of 2000. And even further back, one that shouldn’t have been, the infamous ball that the reach of 12-year-old Jeffrey Maier made a round-tripper against the Orioles in the ’96 ALCS. 

Yes, Jeter’s batting average and OPS are below average this season, especially for a team’s leadoff hitter. That can be forgotten for at least one day. The Yankees won, Mariano Rivera saved it in typical fashion but this game was all Derek Jeter’s. He seized the spotlight and shined. It was history that was inevitable but Jeter made unforgettable. An unparalleled performance in a game where a player got his 3,000th hit, an unparalleled feat for a Yankee. At 37, he’s no longer the best shortstop in the game but he is a legend and you can mark down July 9th as one of the legendary days on the laundry list of incredible for Derek Jeter.

All On Luongo

No major American pro sports postseason does close like the NHL. It has the most game sevens, overtimes and nail biting finishes. Tonight, it’s the biggest game seven you can have, the title on the line. 

Game sevens for a title are rare across the pro sports landscape. There were just two in the NBA in the past decade and only one in the 90s. MLB has had two in each of the past two decades (2002 and 2001, 1997 and 1991). The NHL though has had by far the most in recent history, five since 2001. Its last in 2009 was a classic, Pittsburgh winning the cup by a goal in Detroit.

In less than an hour, the Stanley Cup’s deciding game will be in Vancouver, for which the Canucks have to be thankful. They’ve lost each of the three games in Boston by at least three goals, a combined goal differential of +14 for the Bruins. So it will come down to the man in net for the Canucks, Roberto Luongo.

In Vancouver, Luongo has looked like a world-class goalie, worthy of the 12-year, 64-million contract extension he was signed to preceding the 2009-10 season. There, he shutout the Bruins in two of the three duels. But in Boston, his goaltending has been brutal. In game four, he was pulled in the third period after letting in four goals. But giving up three goals and getting pulled just nine, yes nine, minutes into the first period of game six is almost unthinkable. Calling him Jekyl and Hyde might be an understatement. 

He’s done it before though. In the first round series against Chicago, he got the hook after giving up four goals in 21 minutes in game five. But the Canucks won it in game seven and Luongo allowed just one goal, holding strong for Alexandre Burrows to net the clincher five minutes into overtime.

The cards are stacked against Boston. In the past 20 MLB, NBA and NHL championship game sevens, the road team has won just once, Pittsburgh’s 2009 Stanley Cup. Three other Stanley Cup game sevens have been played up north in Canada, the last in Edmonton in 1987. Each of the Canadian teams has beaten its North American counterpart.

But really, this is Luongo’s biggest moment. A choke here and there’s no trip to the bench and another game for redemption. This is it. If good Luongo doesn’t show up, Vancouver stands no chance, because Boston’s Tim Thomas is consistently excellent.

The two teams have been separated by just one goal in each of the three games in Vancouver. Expect nothing different tonight. For one side, it will be a triumph that leads them to hoist the Cup. But the other will just see a mistake, one that prolongs a Cupless history or decades long drought.

Lebron, Heat, etc. Story #7281

It’s catharsis for Cleveland.

Go back nearly a year ago, the summer of The Decision, the loss of the hometown hero, the ultimate heartbreak for a city without a championship in a long  time and lacking elite stars in most sports.

Scrolling through Twitter following the Mavs’ victory, a flurry of tweets from the CavsforMavs movement filled my feed. A summer and subsequent season in no short supply of vitriol spewed toward one man, LeBron James.

The Big Three of James, Dwayne Wade and Chris Bosh didn’t have too much trouble getting to the Finals. It took the Heat just five games to roll through the East, beating the Sixers, Celtics and Bulls. But this series turned out differently.

Unlike the previous three, Miami never got out to a two-game advantage. The Heat got up 1-0 at home, had a commanding 15-point lead in game two. But with seven minutes left in that one, Dallas altered the course of this series.

The Mavericks forged an epic comeback, an incredible performance by Dirk Nowitzki and company. The Heat followed the historic game two collapse with a win and a 2-1 lead. But again the Mavericks did not back down. They answered in game four and did more with a huge game five victory. Its backs against the wall for the first time these playoffs, Miami could not provide an answer of its own.

So a summer seeped in talk of superstars moving around to create “dream teams” and these type of trifectas forever altering the NBA landscape, it’s instead a team not many talked about in the offseason or the regular season lifting the Larry O’Brien trophy.

The key word there…team. Yes, the Mavericks have a top 10 player in Dirk Nowitzki, a guy who had one of the greatest postseasons I can remember. While Nowitzki drove this run, the guys around him were instrumental. Guys like the undrafted JJ Barea, 17-year veteran Jason Kidd, a guy Nowitzki called out Jason Terry and an offseason signing you didn’t hear much about Tyson Chandler. 

In the deciding game six, Dallas’ bench outscored Miami’s 43-20. Dallas is a better all-around team with an excellent coach in Rick Carlisle who got them to play defense good enough to match up with the Heat’s. But what people will remember from the 2011 NBA Finals outside of Nowitzki’s superb performance is James’ lack of one. He never took over the game, went quiet in the fourth quarter when Nowitzki elevated his game.

In eight seasons, James does not have many defining playoff moments. There was his complete domination of game five of the 2007 Eastern Conference Finals against the Pistons, when he scored all of the Cavs’ finals 25 points and 48 total. There was his game-winning 3-pointer with one-second left that beat the Magic in game two of the 2008 Eastern Finals. But let’s be honest, Nowitzki may have had more defining moments in this postseason alone than James has in his entire playoff career. Nowitzki scored more 4^th quarter points in the Finals then Wade and James combined.

Time and time again, James has fallen short. In Cleveland, the excuse was that he didn’t have enough talent around him. That can’t be an excuse this time playing with Wade and Bosh. Maybe James’ time will come. But right now he’s no Jordan, Bryant, even his very own teammate Wade.

He didn’t do in Cleveland, bolted and didn’t do it in Miami. He may one day but for now, Cleveland's happiness is warranted. Next step, the Cavs’ first and fourth picks and maybe someday not just catharsis but joy from a trophy coming through the streets of downtown Cleveland, a title of its own. 

Man oh Man, it's a circus!

If you didn’t like the circus as a kid, stay away…far away.  It’s Bertolt Brecht gone big top in director Brian Evans' fun and frenetic yet also philosophical reimagining of Man Equals Man.

The play, written in 1926, is by no way archaic, as Evans flings it into modern times, under a circus tent. It’s a beautifully crafted set that really does capture the circus environment, a larger than life MAN=MAN atop it all, flashing aglow at key moments.  A moving British flag platform spins the action around and lifts the characters higher on stage. 

Man is a tale of identity and the malleability of man. Galy Gay (Eb Madson) is a hap-hazard, portly porter who wobbles around the stage with little purpose to his being.  When he encounters Polly (Drew O’Bryan), Uriah (Eric Lynch) and Jesse (Justine Blocksom), a group of soldiers looking to replace a missing comrade, Jip (Zach Kopciak), he’s given one- becoming the new Jip. The next nearly two and a half hours is a quest through their travels and the transformation of a man, as they encounter leading lady Widow Begbick (Heather Petersen) and an ensemble of “natives” and other soldiers. 

Here’s where the circus comes in though. All the characters are dressed as clowns. Gay wears checkered overalls, clown shoes and a face full of white paint. The soldiers also have painted faces and colorful hair that is not something Brecht could have ever seen coming when he wrote this in the mid-1920s. It’s a surrealist aura around the stage, clown soldiers gallivanting whimsically. 

The first act delivers a good deal of laughter. Slapstick comedy is abound with Kopciak bringing the best, particularly when Jip’s head becomes stuck in a temple  and he loses a patch of his red hair. You know it’s Man Equals Man 2011-style when characters drop their shoulders down in an ode to the ‘Bernie.’ While there's a slew of silliness and slapstick, Begwick emerges, beer wagon in tow and enchants the stage. You are captivated by her every move, entranced by her red bee’s nest of hair, so voluminous it could very well hold a bottle of beer. 

She has a Medusa-like power, wooing Bloody Five (J.P. Politz) into a sensual standstill as the lights go down. But, then, like the play itself offers a series of surprises, Bloody Five catapults out of his trance and back into his tough guy character. 

Petersen exquisitely delivers a number of monologues giving some guidance to the feverish goings-on.  Madson also does an adequate job providing the more insightful lines of dialogue that really make you think. He says, “be the way that people want you to be...because it’s so easy.” In that line, he so perfectly encapsulates the transformation of his character from Galy to Jip. 

Following the intermission, that change goes into full force. Madson’s jolly early demeanor descends into the dark world of a deadly soldier.  Jip’s nothing like Gay and Madson smoothly transitions to a vastly different character as the play also gains a much darker tone. You’re left to ponder what is one’s identity, who is man, and if everybody is really the same. But the time it takes to get to the narrative’s conclusion drags on. While the first act is engaging, the second slogs along with not enough thought-provoking moments to outweigh the unnecessary. 

Evans' vision of Man Equals Man is surrealist, even Kubrick-esque. The colors and dark nature are reminiscent of some aspects of the Kubrick classic A Clockwork Orange. There’s a similar bit of mind manipulation and transformation that occurs to Alex present in Man.  

Man Equals Man is not equivalent to perfection, just as its characters’ identities are imperfect. It borders on the cusp of going too far over-the-top but remains visually engaging throughout.  Man’s a bag of popcorn with a few kernels unpopped but mostly pretty tasty and definitely not burnt.   

Workaholics: a bad trip to the bathroom

It’s like a stoner’s version of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia- just not as smart or funny. That’s Workaholics (Wednesdays, 10:30pm), Comedy Central’s newest offering. Like Sunny there are three males saying outrageous stuff, a female co-worker who throws in some barbs and crude antics. I mean, when your pilot is titled “Piss and Shit,” you’re not really pulling any punches with what’s about to come.

Workaholics stars three fresh faces, Anders Holm, Blake Anderson and Adam DeVine, who are also the executive producers. This is their show and the three actors’ characters go by their first names. Anders, Blake and Adam are straight out of college and entering the monotony of the work world but not giving up old habits. They’re smoking blunts, drinking 40s and throwing ‘poop dollars’ from the roof on a Sunday afternoon.

The show’s first scene sets its type of humor from the onset. The word ‘dick’ is thrown around more than you’d even hear in a college dorm, as Anders snaps a shot of his in the bathroom to ‘sext’ it to a girl. But dear friend Adam makes sure everyone at the party gets a text of this too. 

The references to private parts continue with the guys spitting gems such as ‘Dickembe Mutombo.’ Actually, the whole pilot does live up to its name. The central plot revolves around a drug test the guys forget about and are obviously not prepared for. Well, except Anders, who has clean urine samples in his desk drawer. These workaholics are very prepared for the rigors of the post-grad work world.

Except they mess that up and then begin a quest for clean urine that continues on for the rest of the episode. It’s like a stoner’s version of Odysseus’ journey that takes them far and wide, from a drugie’s house to a middle school. Take notice that you will actually see urine splashing around and if that makes you a little queasy this is certainly not the show for you. Frankly if you don’t like vulgarity, stay far away.

Workaholics is like the kid in high school that tries way too hard to be like the cool kids and fails. The three main actors, Holm, Anderson and DeVine all suffer from this terrible comedic plight of overacting. Holm is the most redeemable just because he doesn’t force the comedy quite as much as his counterparts Anderson and Devine. The most objectionable is Anderson, who long, scraggly hair and all plays a milque-toast version of the burnout stereotype.

You can’t blame the cast too much though. There’s only so much you can do when half the dialogue involves a piece of potty humor that you stop thinking is clever once you get your own locker in school. It’s nothing new.

A couple bright spots do shine through outside of the main characters. Jillian, played by Jillian Bell, is a deer in the headlights with a deadpan delivery of which the other actors should take note. Bell’s the most natural of any of them. Brian Huskey’s not a regular but has good comedic timing as the doctor who’s giving the drug test.

For the show to succeed, the guys will need foils to facilitate their antics, so guests could be important. There should be plenty of storylines to sustain the concept for a while but it won’t get a chance to if the writing doesn’t move past the three Ps: poop, pee and penis. It was starting to get old in the pilot and is going to get stale real quick.

If you like Arrested Development or It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, the sophomoric humor of Workaholics probably is not going to be your thing. It’s more down the line of MTV’s The Hard Times of RJ Berger. Workaholics is not one I would make a point to go back to week in and week out. But I’m curious to see where they go with it, so I’d check it out online again after a few more episodes to see if the characters become more fleshed out and the writing improves.  

Cynics hide your heads

Osama bin Laden is dead. It’s a headline Americans have been waiting to hear for nearly a decade, since that September morning when Al Qaeda wreaked sheer havoc on American soil.

Then, I was in seventh grade, sitting in math class unsure of what was going on. Not believing a kid who said planes had hit the Twin Towers. Later that day it became more clear- watching the horrific images on TV, the smell of stale smoke in the air as I walked home from the bus stop, watching fighter jets fly over my house before dinner. It was all too real.

The deaths were all too real for people in my community and those around me.

Now, I sit as a college senior, well older, watching a display of patriotism unseen since the days after 9/11/01 unfold; people screaming “U-S-A,” a kid riding a bike with an American flag in hand and American music blasting out of car windows and bars.

But while most celebrate and enjoy this moment where the U.S. conquered a symbol of death and devastation, others try to kill the excitement. These cynics spout how this means nothing, wondering why people are celebrating when the war is not over and gas prices and the unemployment rate are still high.

Yes, we all know these facts. But it has been awhile since the U.S. has done something this tangibly positive. That we can all agree upon as good. It’s no longer the Cold War era of politics where there’s one bad guy. There always seems to be a grey area, an enemy undefined. Bin Laden was a throwback, a central figure of evil and symbol for extremism.

Americans are not as naïve as some analysts are making them out to be. I don’t think they have some preconception that now war is over, that we are inherently safe from any further violence. Last night was like the end of a movie where the bad guy is killed and the whole movie theater cheers because the good guys took him out.

Except this is real.

Bin Laden orchestrated the death of thousands of people, tore families apart. For those loved ones of the lost, this moment is one they have been awaiting for years. Bin Laden was the prototypical arch-villain. This was not a celebration of death but catharsis.

Those cynics say students celebrating on college campuses are having “a frat party,” that we were too young to understand the scope of that day’s events. Again, they are judging what they don’t know. I may have just been a kid but I will never forget the fear of that September morning, not knowing what was next. I still don’t forget the different world we now live in because of that. My generation has grown up in a political world scoped by the word ‘TERROR.’ I’ve never known anything but strict security at the airport; don’t bat an eye at getting a pat down.

And as kids who maybe couldn’t process the complex gravitas of the attack at its time, we came to know bin Laden as the perpetrator of evil, a murderer of innocent Americans.

So cynics, go hide your heads. We know there are plenty of other problems to tackle. The President of the United States knows that.  No one thinks this is the end of adversity. But it is a victory. In sports, a regular season win is still a win, even if it’s not a championship. If you don’t get enough of those wins that some call “meaningless,” well, you don’t get a shot at the ultimate payoff.

A line from Mark Twain says it well: "I've never wished a man dead, but I have read some obituaries with great pleasure."

Bin Laden and his minions didn’t just wish death. They carried it out. Now Americans revel in his obituary being written. One evil in a world of many is dead. There’s nothing wrong with celebrating that. 
 

Melo, Harry Potter and what's left...

You know that three-headed dog in Harry Potter? Its name- Fluffy. The fearsome creature guards the sorcerer’s stone and is a very unique one.

Well, Fluffy is beginning to become more common in the NBA. One three-headed monster sprung up in Boston a few years back. Then another was constructed this summer in Miami. Garnett/Pierce/Allen, James/Wade/Bosh. And those were just the beginning.

These big dogs are taking shape in big markets across the league. Not all are three-headed monsters. There’s Rose and Boozer in Chicago and the newest two-headed beast in the Big Apple, Carmelo joined with Amare.

There’s good and bad in this. The idea of the superstar duos and trios is certainly intriguing. They can be fun to watch and to see which is the strongest, like a bunch gladiators thrown into the ring where only one comes out alive.

But the bad side is that the NBA is starting to resemble the ugly parts of another pro sports league, MLB. Yes, the NBA still has a cap, so it’s impossible for it to reach quite the economic disparity of baseball. However, the model for winning in the NBA has become tear apart the ship, clear cap space and bring in not just one big gun but a whole arsenal.

It’s not teams that have control. It’s players that are dictating the stakes. The Nuggets could have kept Carmelo Anthony, not traded him as he wanted but at the end of the day, he’s most likely a goner come summer. Denver still loses him and gets nothing in return. We see how well that worked out for the now record-setting losers in Cleveland. 

LeBron James and Anthony were taken in the same draft. Both lifted their franchises back to respectability and deep into the Playoffs. The Cavs set franchise records and reached an NBA Finals. The Nuggets reached the Western Conference Finals.

Now their cupboards are looking as stocked as a poor college kid’s.

For Knicks fans, it’s a time to be cautiously optimistic. They've taken the first step- constructing a duo that can begin to compete with their counterparts.

For NBA fans, it’s a time to sit back and watch in uncertainty. If you’re one in a small market, you might want to start getting worried. There are some superstars like Tim Duncan and Kevin Durant who have stayed loyal to a little city. But that’s not becoming the trend. Will Chris Paul or Dwight Howard bolt for brighter lights and to join other stars?

It has been happening in MLB’s free reign system for years. Getting attached to a player has become something to which small market fans have become desensitized.

NBA fans might want to do the same. It’ll save sadness, heartbreak and a lot of expensive merchandise from going up in flames. Because, just ask those adventurous kids from the famous novel, you won’t reach the ultimate prize if you can’t get by the three-headed dog.